Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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