How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
