the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
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