please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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