I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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