He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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