Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
bring money and cleavage
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
