Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
