I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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