I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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