We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
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