You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Randomize
