I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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