i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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