I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
