if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
