Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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