Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
A+ Viking dick
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