i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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