I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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