god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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