I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
