Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize
