1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
