is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
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