Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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