umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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