im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
