Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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