from now on my penis is your penis
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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