I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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