she was so not down for the gang bang
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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