But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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