I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
