Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Randomize
