He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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