You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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