Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
