there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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