I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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