The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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