Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
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