I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
