you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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