is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize