Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
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