Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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