I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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