6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
