It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
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